— jessica therese, after “15 Texts I Almost Sent To You" by d.a.s

1. We were in tune like synchronised swimmers.
Now I learn to navigate the oceans on my own.
[delete]

2. I sobbed on public transport yesterday.
I wanted to call you but then remembered
I’m not allowed to.
[delete]

3. The truth is: I know I’m better off
without you, but these memories
keep tricking me.
[delete]

4. You make me feel like a walking cliché.
I need to stop romanticising leaving,
stop comparing your collar bones to
valleys and your freckles to constellations.
[delete]

5. Can you jumpstart my heartbeat again?
I’m running so low on fuel.
[delete]

6. God knows I need to delete your number.
[delete]

7. Please don’t ever contact me again.
[delete]

8. Perhaps we were destined to falter
from the start,
just as Venice is doomed to sink.
[delete]

9. Speaking of Venice,
you should visit while there
is still time.
[delete]

10. You made the words
feel just right. Now they spin
off kilter.
[delete]

11. You had little nicknames for me.
I secretly miss being called moon shell,
tiger, fairy nymph.
[delete]

12. Maybe we were just a collection
of dead ends and false starts.
We should have been disqualified
from the beginning.
[delete]

13. Grief is the same in any language.
I mourn you. I collect flowers and place them
on your grave in the cemetery.
[delete]

14. You are so much more than human.
[delete]

15. Despite all of this, there is some
beautiful solitude in sleeping with
only my heartbeat
for company.
[delete]