If I Would Let Myself Tell You

If I would let myself tell you
Where I’ve come and gone
If I would let myself tell you
How far I have run
If I would let myself tell you
Where I now stand
Then maybe you could help me
And tell me you understand

If I would let myself tell you
About my hidden, darkened fears
If I would let myself tell you
Of my struggles through the years
If I would let myself tell you
My joy of breaking through
Then maybe you could help me
Continue what I do

If I would let myself tell you
Of the battles in my heart
If I would let myself tell you
What shatters me apart
If I would let myself tell you
How fragile I can be
Then maybe you could help me
Escape and just be free

If I would let myself tell you
Why I struggle with each word
If I would let myself tell you
How I’m scared of being heard
If I would let myself tell you
That I wish I could let go
Then maybe you could help me
Because then you would know

If I would let myself tell you
Then all this could disappear
If I would let myself tell you
Then you’d see me crystal clear
If I would let myself tell you
Then at least my tears would flow
Just maybe, maybe now
I’ll allow you to know.

~ Devorah Zolotarev