for once just look at it from my point of view

I'm tired of everything, and I've been that for a while

and for the past few days I've been close to collapse

and tears. I'm tired of telling myself that it doesn't mean

anything or that its gonna be okay I'm tired of always making up excuses for others.

I'm tired of hanging loose - i'm tired of drama

i'm tired of the people i love hurting me

i'm tired of loving him

i'm tired of having all these thoughts

I'm tired of the words

I'm tired of people saying "I will", I want people -->to do<--

because your words and promises means absolutely nothing to me unless

you prove it by doing.

For in my life its always action before words.

A man is judge my the qualities of his actions

not by the length of his words

i'm tired of everything but one

i'm not tired of hope.its keeps me up, and lets me wake up. it helps me through the say but for once I want to be able to let my guard down and not think several steps ahead no I don't want people in my life asking how are you i want those who would stretch out their palm who would silently come up and sit next to me, who would give a puff and just let the silence do the talking. I want people who wouldn't ask me to stay strong.

I want people who would make me strong as I would them. I want people who are curious, life-loving and energetic yet have their own story and I want people that I can give myself to. People who wouldn't bring me down unless I was warned. Because last thing on earth I'd do is drag anyone into my life. I don't want anyone who doesn't need me. Because we all serve a deeper purpose in life.We don't have the people around us by co-incident. they are all there because of some reason. But once again I'm telling you all this... i'm dancing on the line of life and I have a fear of heights but i'm so close now that i just can't care. i just can't keep going like this and i can't breathe. It is as if someone is trying to drown me, yet I keep fighting for the light. fighting and fighting and fighting and fighting. but now i'm just tired. just tired...